I couldn't decide what to write about tonight. Do I tell everyone my thoughts on the young girl working at our local fried chicken restaurant with the gigantic cartoonish tattoo of roses and bullets across her ample busom that reads FUCT LUCK? Or how I started Weight Watchers today and already failed miserably? Or do I tell you all about how we're engaged in a potentially dangerous, but nonetheless exciting struggle over money with the Russian mob?
So I'm going with the mob story.
Remember how I told you all in one of my recent posts that my husband finally decided it might be ok to put an offer in on a house we'd been looking at for a while?
It's a great house for us. Not too young, not too old. A little bigger than our house with a much more family-friendly vibe.
There's a cute creek running through the backyard and a cute bridge going over the cute creek.
Can you see the bridge?
It's also pretty clear that for at least some time period the owners weren't living in or caring for the property. Oh, and then there's the whole foreclosure process that's going on that is a dead giveaway there may be problems.
Last week my husband kind of by happenstance figured out he knows the next door neighbor. Perfect! He called to get scoop.
And scoop we got.
The previous-slash-current owners? They're from Russia. And they're connected. Or at least they were. Until the husband's untimely death. During a federal investigation. Scandalous!
I was instantly curious about where the guy died, but thankfully it wasn't in the house and they'd moved out about a year before that. So we put in an embarrassingly low lowball offer yesterday because that's the only kind of offer my husband can possibly stomach. On anything. I digress.
Their agent (who is also Russian) made it very clear that they have numerous offers and that ours was so offensive her client wouldn't even look at it. The client that was still alive. Even though it's a short sale and the bank will be taking a loss on the home? So we said fine. Keep it. And then today there was all sorts of backpeddling and shuck-and-jiving going on and I always love a good shuck-and-jive story.
Their agent (who is also Russian) made it very clear that they have numerous offers and that ours was so offensive her client wouldn't even look at it. The client that was still alive. Even though it's a short sale and the bank will be taking a loss on the home? So we said fine. Keep it. And then today there was all sorts of backpeddling and shuck-and-jiving going on and I always love a good shuck-and-jive story.
All I can say is there's about a 1% chance we'll actually end up buying the house, but if we do you can be 100% sure it's gonna make a good story!
- H
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