I gots the fever

Oh, I can feel it coming on like I'm sure the mentally ill can feel a switch coming. Not that I don't qualify for that, too, but you know. I suddenly have the bloggin fever. So many things to write about, so little ability to focus my ADD and sit down and write it out.

So here's an abbreviated version for you. Things that have been rattling around in my mind these days.

1. Jenny Craig calls me too much. Seriously. I signed up last Friday, and I think they've called me four times since then?! My own mother hasn't called me that often. I mean, I've called her that often because I have to call her every day or my world seems to feel unglued, but you know. The Jenny people? I have to tell them to take me off their speed dial. When I If I fall off the wagon, I'll get back up from my sugar coma and dust the donut frosting off my face and get back on it without them calling me to check and make sure that I'm eating their ridiculously small entrees and not Krispy Kremes. Not that that's happened this week or anything. Twice. I'm just sayin. I go in for my weigh-in today. You may hear sobbing later on.

2. Pearl Jam totally stole a guitar riff from Bob Dylan. Or Shawn Colvin. I am in the midst of researching this blatant theft but haven't actually done any more than think about it while I'm in the car and write about it here. See, their new song (and by the by, I am very glad they're back to making music again) called "Just Breathe" starts with a guitar rhythm or riff that is exactly the same riff that starts Shawn Colvin's version of Bob Dylan's "You're Gonna Make Me Lonesome When You Go." I know this because every time it comes on the radio, I think oh, yay, I'm going to hear some kickass Bob Dylan by way of Shawn Colvin now, and it doesn't happen. So. I'll be doing some further research on this matter, you can be sure of that.

3. NPR's fund drive is going on right now, so I regularly listen to other stations because I can't bring myself to donate money to NPR because I hate Daniel Schorr. Seriously, when I hear someone introducing him I will click the button and listen to something else. I would listen to Yo Gabba Gabba songs before I listen to the vitriol that man spews. I know NPR leans left and I know they attempt to maintain some balance. But there is no balance in this man. He's hate and bitterness and he's not impartial. SO, I refuse to give them any more of my money than has not already been taken out of my paycheck in the form of taxes. Hrmph. I am officially now a grumpy old man.

4. Does anyone else feel like the Census thing is getting a little out of hand? I fear someone may show up at my door with a handgun, threatening me if I haven't already filled out our census forms. I filled it out and mailed it in. You hear me, guvment? I filled it out! So stop with the constant advertising and billboards. How much does that cost, anyway? You could take half of that advertising money, throw it into the public schools pool and keep many thousands of teachers from being laid off this year. I'm just saying.

5. I got to eat lunch with my old friend Jenna a few weeks ago, on a Saturday no less, which is way unheard of, and it was so nice to see her. I can see now that I need to find some time and write more about this visit because it was fun.

Alright. That's it peeps. Thanks for listening.

I think we all know who we can blame for this.

**Warning: This post is about modern-day politics. Not so much about my opinion on such goings-on because I think I've made it super clear that I have no respect for either political party and I regularly daydream about a third party that I like to call the Common Sense (inexpensive) Option. But I digress.**

Soooo. We have healthcare. Yep, that's right. In case you didn't hear Joe Biden shout into a microphone that they passed a big f&@*ing bill yesterday, well, they did.

Not that many people are happy about it. All I've heard since then are people complaining about it. They either didn't want it to begin with, they don't want to pay for it, they feel it didn't go far enough, they wanted it to have a public option, they didn't want the Louisiana Purchase, blah blah blah.

I thought it would be helpful if we could just all find one common foe to fight. Wouldn't that make us all feel a little better?

So here you go.

I think if you really consider it, Canada truly is to blame.

Feels good to find a scapegoat. Feels real good.

By the by, I'm not serious. Please, anonymous. Don't yell at me. I love Canadians and I love Canada. My own two brothers were born in Canada. I like maple leaves. I like syrup. See?

Whew. Dodged that bullet.

**By the way, if you're ever bored and want to watch the funniest South Park episode ever, watch this one. It's my favorite.**
- H

The one where I talk about politics

I had an anonymous commenter on my previous post take issue with the fact that I had a political post and griped about the media's hatred of all things Right.

So I feel I should clarify something up front. I have opinions about politics, the media, our society, life in general, my husband, the economy or what's left of it, religion, Sarah Palin, parenting, crafting, and everything else I forgot to mention. And sometimes you'll hear them pop up on this blog. For better or worse.

It's cool if you don't agree with me, I'm ok with that. My own family and many friends don't agree with me most of the time. In my family I'm considered the Leftwinger. I think that's what makes the world go round. And round. And round.

Feel free to dissent. Just don't be offended if you read something you disagree with. What a boring place if we all agreed with each other. It'd be like a Today Show interview between Matt Lauer and Barack Obama, where Matt Lauer asks Barack if he can kiss him on the lips cause he just loves him so much.

Tee hee, sorry. I couldn't help myself.

**In a way, I consider this similar to all the blogs I read that throw in Bible scriptures and their feelings on what God wants us to do along with a tutorial on how to make a shopping bag. I can take the majority of the blog for what it's worth and ignore the parts I choose to ignore, you know what I mean? End sidebar.**

- H

what the ?

I stopped in to Barnes and Noble today, to look at new sewing books and let my brain go blank for awhile for free. Come on, you know you've all done it. You go to Borders and read books for free, and then leave.

As I was browsing through the magazines, I came upon this.




Seriously.


There is an entire glossy magazine devoted to Sarah Palin. It's almost as though they wanted to write a book but maybe realized there wouldn't be enough to fill the pages, and basically she's just a glossy pinup so let's put her on the cover of a glossy magazine and try to fake like there's substance in it.


Did Sarah Palin pay for this? Cause this is just nuts.

I get it, she's pretty (for a politician). But come on. I have to rant politically here for a minute because this turns my stomach as much as that stupid Newsweek cover with Barack Obama backlit like the second messiah long before the election.

This just makes me want to puke for our country. Puke, I tell you! It sickens me that half the country would actually be willing to line up behind this woman, especially now that we know a lot more about her.

And you know what? I think the media outlets, as much as they hate Republicans and whatnot, are actually giving her a lot of face time to create the very backlash I'm having right now. I think it's a conspiracy. There are plenty of other qualified, intelligent, young, good-looking Republican pols out there, but Sarah Gidget Palin is the only one we hear about.

Bobby Jindal, where are you?

- H