This is the dilemma with blogging. How much can I share without sharing too much? What do I really write for, if not for sharing? If I didn't want to share it, I'd put it somewhere no one would know to look for it, somewhere private or anonymous. Or I wouldn't put it anywhere, just push it all down and swallow it and complain to someone on the phone who can stand to listen to me for longer than five minutes.
I feel conflicted about this blogging thing sometimes, because I can't seem to reconcile writing about my life or just about things in general with knowing that everyone isn't on board. Everyone involved isn't really down with me telling everyone else what the hell is going on, eh? So I don't.
But man, is there some whacky shit going on. A friend of mine suggested I take a little getaway, take a break, come visit her, yadda yadda. Step away from the insanity of my household and get my wits about me. But I can't. I honestly have rolled my current situation (our current situation) around in my head six ways from Sunday and the best I can come up with is to keep on keeping on.
I love my job. I really really do. In the thirteen years since I've been in this industry, what I do now, what I've done for the last year, has by far been my absolute favorite thing ever. And sadly, it's also the riskiest. I liken what I'm doing now to swimming upstream. In quicksand. Dragging other people along behind you, except they're pulling in the opposite direction because they either don't understand why you're swimming that way or don't agree with it.
It's fun!
But it's not secure. Sadly, the Powers That Be aren't entirely comfortable with what I (not just me, my whole team) am doing. They like the results, but they have a hard time making the decisions to support us. So it's a touch stressful to have my current job situation shake and rattle while my hubs is no longer working. And my kids neat to eat. Every day, can you believe that? And apparently we need to keep a roof over our heads. And so I keep on keeping on.
That's about as clear as mud, but that's good for now. Maybe I can learn to write in code. Igpay atinlay.
- H
10/3/10
Elaborating
By Heather on 10/03/2010
This is about working while mommying
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
5 comments:
hugs!!!!
I'm in 'kind of' the same situation. I have a health issue that's pushing me out of my job. I'll be able to get social security disabilty because of it, but DH says I should just go back to work instead. Problem is, my JOB is the one telling me to stay home. I didn't ask to be home, they sent me home, and told me to not come back. They said (basically) i'm a liability, and they don't want me there. (They were a little nicer about the whole thing, just trying to keep a long story short). The whole thing sucks, but what am I supposed to do?
I hope everything works out for you, and that you have good support.
i hear you on the how much to share thing. And, p.s., you can always call and vent to me.
HUGS!!! I hope the clarity becomes a little mess muddy soon for you. I know it can be hard to know how much to share in your blog which is understandable and OK as long as you are sharing with someone! You know we are always here for you even if it is just online and hundreds of miles away. HUGS- MJ
I have never been shocked by anyones life confessions on a blog. Actually quite the opposite. Its usually at the point when folks share more than polite company would dictate that I actually really like the blogger. They suddenly become real. Why do you think Oprah is so popular? Because she shares the crappy stuff that happens to her along the way. And she keeps on keeping on. Easy to do you might say when one is the richest woman in the US. My point is: Its the fight to fix what ailes our lives that makes you interesting. A false air of perfection just makes you Martha. Be Oprah...so much more interesting.
Post a Comment